One Cause. What matters most.

If you were to give up everything, your property, your family,your reputation, your very life, for one thing. What would that thing be (if anything)? I'm speaking about something you hold so dear you would risk your soul on it (if you believe you have one). This question is posed in regards to motivation for someone who does not see the point in continuing. What do you live for? And what would you die for? What is greater than than all things? What is greater than the self?

I suppose the answer to all this would be "true love" whatever the thing or person you love is. True love means that you respect the other more than yourself, that you are willing to sacrifice things for their own happiness and that give many things to them because you want them to have everything they need. Truly being in love with someone makes you feel like you live your life for them, the purpose of your being is to contribute to their happiness and well being so you would do anything to avoid them being in pain and misery. This kind of love is not only possible between human beings, but you could love your job in such a way that you are almost married to it because you have no time for other things. You could feel this love for animals for instance, either one of your pets or wild animals that you adore, so you end up opening a park for them (lions and tiger-lovers) or you end up being a scientist and studying their life (whales, sharks, anything that is wild). If you find such love for something you usually end up dedicating your entire life to it because you get the most pleasure from spending all your time being with that one thing, whatever that may be.

Good answer. I think the problem is not that this fellow does not love anything but that he does not love himself. Perhaps it is true that you can not truly love anyone or anything if you do not love yourself. I won't express it to him this way as it would probably be offensive. Instead when he says whats the point I will try to divert the discussion to towards improving self esteem. Unfortunately I am not very good at that.

If one actually believes in the soul and I do not , I would think the only real choice would be to be the sacrifice, to Have a chance to be the messiah.

I do not believe in an afterlife or a soul so I can say that I would likely only knowingly take a bullet for a loved one be it family or friend. I would always think twice in helping a stranger.

As for worldly goals I would strive to achieve them but take no short cuts and cut no deals. It would take away from the achievement.

Personally, in any normal circumstances, I would not give up my life (being alive) for anything.

In one philosophical perspective, everything is an illusion and there is no inherent things and self to give up.
Btw, I am not chasing for eternal life, but rather optimal living within the circumstances and the limits of the physical self.

Reality is conditioned upon and correlated with a life, and living. If one gives up one's life (i.e. prematurely) then one is giving up on the whole of reality. So what is more critical that is within reality (partial) than the whole of reality.
As such, being alive is the last thing one should give up before anything else.

Self-approval. I would want to be able to look back and say I lived a good life that was worthy of my own approval. I would want to be able to say the decisions I made are decisions I could be proud of. I would want my everlasting caricature to be a someone who I could admire and respect.

I know it's hard to say this is something greater than the self, but it kind of is. The person I want to live up to being is a person who is in my imagination before he is in my shoes. I would never want to live forever as a slouch, a downtrodden, or a beaten soul. I would rather die eternally than lose my own respect.

[Scott]

Rinoa makes a great point about what she calls true love. Indeed, I would die to save my wife or kids from death or some terrible suffering. That would be at the top of my list. Although, I worry the OP is vague on this point since it says "give up [...] your family". Does that mean give them up in the sense that I am dead or otherwise I cannot spend more time with them or in the sense that something has happened to them besides merely losing contact with me?

Grecorivera5150, makes a good point about -- in my own words and interpretation -- the way one who actually believes in an afterlife might be less likely to find heroism in living and dying for something. Like Grecorivera5150, I also do not believe in a supernatural afterlife, so to ask me to die for something is a big request especially from a selfish perspective, presumably much bigger a request than to ask someone who doesn't really believe in death.

Spectrum takes an excellent philosophical look that questions that foundations of the question itself.

Sleeper1 also gives a good general answer, which is probably more philosophical than the approach I will now take.

I would like to take a slightly different approach and answer the question directly. As stated above my family is number 1, and coincidentally like Spectrum I may really not be willing to die for anything simply because I selfishly want to stay with my family or want to keep them happy by not dying prematurely on them for some cause. Putting that aside though, imagining for instance hypothetically that I did not have a family or the thought experiment was otherwise restructured slightly to make the existence of and/or effect on my family moot, here are some of the top things I would die for:

1. end world hunger and poverty
2. end war
3. end or nearly end rape and murder
4. free all slaves, political prisoners and non-violent prisoners incarcerated for consensual crimes (e.g. marijuana possession)
5. save humanity from extinction
6. save the life of a child

Nothing matters most. This is an Absurd question. If you know someone looking for meaning tell him (or her): there is no meaning. There is only that reflection of the self that permeates our physical actions and appearances. You can accept the reality of the situation you are presented with, or you can deny it. Denial (Nihilism) is cowardly, and proves that you don't know how to live. Don't be a believer only when there is a good reason. Don't live only when it is convenient. This is not really life, after all. You know life, and happiness (which I assume is being missed here) by pain and despair; and hoping for a 'great cause' or an easy death by suicide are both wrong. Accept and move on. It is the only way.

Nothing matters most. This is an Absurd question. If you know someone looking for meaning tell him (or her): there is no meaning. There is only that reflection of the self that permeates our physical actions and appearances. You can accept the reality of the situation you are presented with, or you can deny it. Denial (Nihilism) is cowardly, and proves that you don't know how to live. Don't be a believer only when there is a good reason. Don't live only when it is convenient. This is not really life, after all. You know life, and happiness (which I assume is being missed here) by pain and despair; and hoping for a 'great cause' or an easy death by suicide are both wrong. Accept and move on. It is the only way.

That answer may have truth but it it utterly useless in persuading a lost soul that life has meaning. I myself am ill equipped to provide a reason which is why I seek the advise of others, as for me I am simply because I am, however that answer is insufficient for my friend and I suspect a vast many others (in truth sometimes it is even quite insufficient for myself as well). Telling him that life is just how it is, or suck it up essentially does not aid his crisis.

For others, in the right context. The context depends on the situation, however the feelings generated by the situation must be sufficient to drive the individual to come to the decision to sacrifice their life for whatever it might be. I have experienced situations when I have expected to be put in harms way, putting myself there to protect a colleague, not someone I "love" as such (and yes it goes without saying that you would sacrifice yourself for your nearest and dearest). In the military, the bond through shared hardship with colleagues drives individuals to think bigger than themselves, if necessary to sacrifice the self for the betterment of the whole.

With regard to crisis intervention and finding something someone would live for, you have to increase rationality by reducing the immediate stress of the situation. You have to speak calmly with a slower than normal cadence and use active listening - reflecting, effective pauses, paraphrasing, summarising, non verbal encouragement etc etc. You need to create time and engage with your subject to allow them to become calmer. You build rapport, being lead initially in the conversation, but as time talking increases, the subject will become more rational. You identify hooks, things which appear to lift the subject and explore those topics to establish what is really going on. You look for themes beneath the words and explore the things you identify as important to the subject. Once you have rapport, have gained trust and know what is important you may be able to begin influencing an individual toward a positive outcome. There is obviously a lot to it but these are the basic tactics you might use to find out what is worth living for in a crisis situation.

Paul

For others, in the right context. The context depends on the situation, however the feelings generated by the situation must be sufficient to drive the individual to come to the decision to sacrifice their life for whatever it might be. I have experienced situations when I have expected to be put in harms way, putting myself there to protect a colleague, not someone I "love" as such (and yes it goes without saying that you would sacrifice yourself for your nearest and dearest). In the military, the bond through shared hardship with colleagues drives individuals to think bigger than themselves, if necessary to sacrifice the self for the betterment of the whole.

With regard to crisis intervention and finding something someone would live for, you have to increase rationality by reducing the immediate stress of the situation. You have to speak calmly with a slower than normal cadence and use active listening - reflecting, effective pauses, paraphrasing, summarising, non verbal encouragement etc etc. You need to create time and engage with your subject to allow them to become calmer. You build rapport, being lead initially in the conversation, but as time talking increases, the subject will become more rational. You identify hooks, things which appear to lift the subject and explore those topics to establish what is really going on. You look for themes beneath the words and explore the things you identify as important to the subject. Once you have rapport, have gained trust and know what is important you may be able to begin influencing an individual toward a positive outcome. There is obviously a lot to it but these are the basic tactics you might use to find out what is worth living for in a crisis situation.

Paul

Sound advice Paul. Truthfully I don't think he intends to harm himself he has just slipped into a funk which I see growing deeper. I wish to help him (and myself to a lesser extent) to figure out what should have meaning. I realize the question may be impossible to answer. But I know my limitations and if I wish to answer his questions and can not do so adequately then I will confer with outside sources for more ideas. I appreciate any and all feedback as this truly is one of if not the greatest challenge many people face in their lives. Thanks to all for sharing your ideas.

The will is greater than the self, in the end it will be done. I guess.

I would not give up family members or any other precious things in my life, but if I had the chance and the capacity, I would like to learn all there is to know abouth everything. Complete knowledge and wisdom would be the greatest treasure that any person could have.

I would not give up family members or any other precious things in my life, but if I had the chance and the capacity, I would like to learn all there is to know abouth everything. Complete knowledge and wisdom would be the greatest treasure that any person could have.

I feel the same way. However I have noticed that simple people are often relived of many of the heavy burdens intellectuals wrestle with. Is it better to be intelligent and unhappy or dim and joyful. I will always lean towards intellect and reason but sometimes I envy those who have no questions and simply enjoy life. Conversely though there are also hordes of idiots constantly provoked by the rage of their leaders so perhaps it has nothing to do with intellect.