Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
- Vagueabsolute
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Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Why do you think this is?
A few reasons that seem plausible to me are as follows.
Reason #1
Conceding gives a sense of control in contrast to having success ripped out of your hands.
Reason #2
Giving up can give the impression that you never cared, does sparing some pride.
Reason #3
Giving up in the pursuit of one thing, leaves time and energy for something else to be Achieved.
Reason #4
One may give up on hope in fear of disappointment.
Reason #5
Hope can be heavy and straining, letting go of it may be easier.
- LuckyR
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Great topic!Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
A few reasons that seem plausible to me are as follows.
Reason #1
Conceding gives a sense of control in contrast to having success ripped out of your hands.
Reason #2
Giving up can give the impression that you never cared, does sparing some pride.
Reason #3
Giving up in the pursuit of one thing, leaves time and energy for something else to be Achieved.
Reason #4
One may give up on hope in fear of disappointment.
Reason #5
Hope can be heavy and straining, letting go of it may be easier.
I am very familiar with the concept since I am a tennis player and the way tennis is played and scored makes it a zero sum game, emotionally. This can be ego crushing so it is well known among players for fostering this "fear of losing" rather than "desire for winning" mindset.
The other common stereotype of the concept is fear of rejection among men in the dating game.
- Vagueabsolute
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Indeed, not asking out of fearing rejection, truly seam counterproductive.LuckyR wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 1:12 pmGreat topic!Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
A few reasons that seem plausible to me are as follows.
Reason #1
Conceding gives a sense of control in contrast to having success ripped out of your hands.
Reason #2
Giving up can give the impression that you never cared, does sparing some pride.
Reason #3
Giving up in the pursuit of one thing, leaves time and energy for something else to be Achieved.
Reason #4
One may give up on hope in fear of disappointment.
Reason #5
Hope can be heavy and straining, letting go of it may be easier.
I am very familiar with the concept since I am a tennis player and the way tennis is played and scored makes it a zero sum game, emotionally. This can be ego crushing so it is well known among players for fostering this "fear of losing" rather than "desire for winning" mindset.
The other common stereotype of the concept is fear of rejection among men in the dating game.
- Pattern-chaser
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Risk aversion. We safeguard ourselves by limiting our risks. The only difficult part of that is deciding exactly where to draw the line, between what we will try, and what we will avoid?Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
"Who cares, wins"
- Vagueabsolute
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Often, even when the reward outweighs the risk, the risk isn’t taken anyway. Fear is a two edged blade, don’t you think? The edge of that blade that’s facing you is surely a culprit here.Pattern-chaser wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:30 amRisk aversion. We safeguard ourselves by limiting our risks. The only difficult part of that is deciding exactly where to draw the line, between what we will try, and what we will avoid?Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
- Pattern-chaser
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
Pattern-chaser wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:30 am Risk aversion. We safeguard ourselves by limiting our risks. The only difficult part of that is deciding exactly where to draw the line, between what we will try, and what we will avoid?
We each weigh these things differently. Some of us are more risk-averse than others. Is this wrong, do you think?Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:38 am Often, even when the reward outweighs the risk, the risk isn’t taken anyway. Fear is a two edged blade, don’t you think? The edge of that blade that’s facing you is surely a culprit here.
"Who cares, wins"
- Vagueabsolute
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Wrong? Not at all. However, it becomes an issue when you personally deem the risk-taking worth it, only to refrain from shouldering that risk.Pattern-chaser wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 1:26 pmVagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?Pattern-chaser wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:30 am Risk aversion. We safeguard ourselves by limiting our risks. The only difficult part of that is deciding exactly where to draw the line, between what we will try, and what we will avoid?We each weigh these things differently. Some of us are more risk-averse than others. Is this wrong, do you think?Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:38 am Often, even when the reward outweighs the risk, the risk isn’t taken anyway. Fear is a two edged blade, don’t you think? The edge of that blade that’s facing you is surely a culprit here.
- Samana Johann
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Only if ignorant one does not give up what's not possible to control, subject to decay, no real refuge, not one's own.Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
A few reasons that seem plausible to me are as follows.
Reason #1
Conceding gives a sense of control in contrast to having success ripped out of your hands.
Reason #2
Giving up can give the impression that you never cared, does sparing some pride.
Reason #3
Giving up in the pursuit of one thing, leaves time and energy for something else to be Achieved.
Reason #4
One may give up on hope in fear of disappointment.
Reason #5
Hope can be heavy and straining, letting go of it may be easier.
Maybe the question bases on basic wrong view, while actually very worthy to consider well.
Only one who really gives up is able to access what lies beyond, heads toward the deathless.
And what has to be feared to be take on, proper to let go, wise to seek no refuge in it?
The wise fears what's proper to fear, while the unwise has no fear of dangers at all, meet decay after decay.
- Samana Johann
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
- Samana Johann
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
The large limit, good houeholder, might be not willing to go for something outside of one's perception, ever on following the same pattern not seeing any lasting escape, or even unaware of lose following ever on.Pattern-chaser wrote: ↑March 9th, 2023, 10:30 amRisk aversion. We safeguard ourselves by limiting our risks. The only difficult part of that is deciding exactly where to draw the line, between what we will try, and what we will avoid?Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
In June 1983 I changed from riding a geared bike, to riding a singles speed fixed wheel bike, you have to pedal every inch of the way. The most I had done on a fixed was about 200K. There was a 1200K event in France, the Paris -Brest - Paris in August, and I decided to enter on the fixed. I tried two shorter training events and packed on both of them after about 600K. I decided to ride about 200K to the start, and 200K home after. This was now a thousand K more than I had ever done. By adding another 400K extra, made the twelve hundred K seem easy.Vagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am
I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
The ride happens every four years, over two thousand riders from all over the world turned up. I was the only one to start and finish on a single speed fixed. This meant turning the pedals round about 225,000 times in 84 hours.
The mind is a strange thing. I sincerely believe we can all achieve far more than we ever think possible. Probably it is our minds that limit what we can do.
- Samana Johann
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
- Samana Johann
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
Yes, the "fox and the source grapes" philosophy is another to prevent from good efforts, aside of not knowing of what's worthy to give into.Carter Blunt wrote: ↑March 11th, 2023, 8:53 pm I can't say it's a fear of "losing", so much as an aversion to having my time wasted. Society promising me "hard work pays off", but never let me collect on the payout. Narcissist cliques picking me as the inferior one, and I'm supposed to agree with it or something. I value cooperation over competition, so "winning" isn't on my list of priorities.
Both "there are no fruits from deeds" as well as somebody, something, supreme is in charge of pleasure and pain, are grave wrong view, are ideas leading to effortlessness and downwardly.
- Vagueabsolute
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Re: Why do the fear of losing often lead to giving up?
But you don’t know whats not possibly, do you?Samana Johann wrote: ↑March 11th, 2023, 8:11 amOnly if ignorant one does not give up what's not possible to controlVagueabsolute wrote: ↑March 8th, 2023, 9:47 am I have found that a fear of losing or failing can push people to give up or refrain from even trying.
Why do you think this is?
A few reasons that seem plausible to me are as follows.
Reason #1
Conceding gives a sense of control in contrast to having success ripped out of your hands.
Reason #2
Giving up can give the impression that you never cared, does sparing some pride.
Reason #3
Giving up in the pursuit of one thing, leaves time and energy for something else to be Achieved.
Reason #4
One may give up on hope in fear of disappointment.
Reason #5
Hope can be heavy and straining, letting go of it may be easier.
When winning is your only desire, giving up can never be an option.
With your arms and legs severed, would you let your murderer drag you to your end, or would you bite down on the ground?
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