You wrote a great deal more and I picked out only this little bit because it is basic to much of the rest.Ontology will therefore limit it-self to declaring that everything takes place as if the in-itself in a project to found itself gave itself the modification of the for-itself.
"In-itself" is causa sui (cause of itself) in a deterministic sense , like you cannot change what must happen to you because your circumstances plus laws of nature have captured the being of you since your birth, before your birth, and for all time.
"for-itself" is also causa sui, cause of itself, as the self struggles to make itself as a work in progress. The for-itself could not do this ever risky endeavour unless the in-itself , which I presume is nature, had the inbuilt facility of man to make himself what he is and will be. In other words existence precedes being: what you do is what makes you what you are.
Corollary is that man has multiple choices due to his being conscious, choices that are not available to stones, mice, and honey bees.
Awareness of one's own self characterises , not dreams, but waking consciousness. Consciousness of self has been attributed to at least one chimpanzee who has been taught English. When my dog looked at herself in the mirror she was not interested when she discovered that what she was seeing provided neither food nor companionship so she was not conscious of self and I doubt that she ever could be conscious of self.You and I are conscious of self to the extent that we make personal decisions to( for instance) stop some bad habit that we know that we are partial to, or live better lives, and so on. Inserting consideration of self into our environments gives us a lot more choice than other beings have, even when we are in prison or confined to a sick bed because of disability.but I can be an exhaustive consciousness of it since I am at once consciousness of the being and self-consciousness.