The November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month is In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.

Love on the First Sight

Use this forum to discuss the August 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, Living in Color: A Love Story, In Sickness and in Health by Mike Murphy
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Sushan
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Love on the First Sight

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This topic is about the August 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, Living in Color: A Love Story, In Sickness and in Health by Mike Murphy


It was a feeling you hear a lot from people describing what they experienced meeting the love of their life—something I’d always dismissed as exaggeration and being overly sentimental. But I truly felt like I’d met her before, as if I already knew her intimately, and was just re-meeting her after a long separation.
(Location 217 - Kindle version)

The concept of 'love on the first sight' is another concept that is found in literature of romance genre. Occasionally, like this author, people claim of having this feeling or the moment.

Is it a real thing? Or is it a 'made-up' reason for getting attracted towards or falling in love with someone when it is impossible to deliver a rational reason? Or is it a variation of the Deja vu phenomenan?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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JDBowden
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by JDBowden »

Made up. An individual finds one attractive by bodily symmetry to what I understand. So, we label an individual attractive and try to describe an intangible feeling with pretty romanticized words by "love at first sight" and "soul mates." Seems to me like a type of personal justification for whom they had chosen.
"Our disturbances come only from our own opinions … everything that we see will change and no longer exist … the universe is change and life is opinion."

― Marcus Aurelius
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by LuckyR »

Obviously such a commonly used phrase is going to have numerous origins depending on individual circumstances. Some may reimagine their relationship's origin story with a rosy overtone. Others may have a genuine feeling of familiarity out of step with the amount of time spent together.
"As usual... it depends."
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by stevie »

Sushan wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:56 am The concept of 'love on the first sight' is another concept that is found in literature of romance genre. Occasionally, like this author, people claim of having this feeling or the moment.

Is it a real thing? Or is it a 'made-up' reason for getting attracted towards or falling in love with someone when it is impossible to deliver a rational reason? Or is it a variation of the Deja vu phenomenan?
First there is an appearance and then speculative thought sets in. It's always the same, regardless what phenomenon you refer to. Your questions only refer to this innate speculative drive the products of which don't add anything reliable to appearances.
mankind ... must act and reason and believe; though they are not able, by their most diligent enquiry, to satisfy themselves concerning the foundation of these operations, or to remove the objections, which may be raised against them [Hume]
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

JDBowden wrote: August 6th, 2022, 2:57 pm Made up. An individual finds one attractive by bodily symmetry to what I understand. So, we label an individual attractive and try to describe an intangible feeling with pretty romanticized words by "love at first sight" and "soul mates." Seems to me like a type of personal justification for whom they had chosen.
I think your thoughts resonate with mine. I too think the same. I think many of us face a dilemma when we are asked about our feelings when we get in a romantic relationship. So, we tend to make things up, and this 'love on the first sight' thing can very well be such a practice.
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

LuckyR wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:33 pm Obviously such a commonly used phrase is going to have numerous origins depending on individual circumstances. Some may reimagine their relationship's origin story with a rosy overtone. Others may have a genuine feeling of familiarity out of step with the amount of time spent together.
I can agree with that touch of a 'rosy overtone' to the experience. But regarding the feeling of familiarity, can it be just a feeling, or can it be what is described as 'deja vu'?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

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stevie wrote: August 7th, 2022, 12:46 am
Sushan wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:56 am The concept of 'love on the first sight' is another concept that is found in literature of romance genre. Occasionally, like this author, people claim of having this feeling or the moment.

Is it a real thing? Or is it a 'made-up' reason for getting attracted towards or falling in love with someone when it is impossible to deliver a rational reason? Or is it a variation of the Deja vu phenomenan?
First there is an appearance and then speculative thought sets in. It's always the same, regardless what phenomenon you refer to. Your questions only refer to this innate speculative drive the products of which don't add anything reliable to appearances.
I am sorry, but I do not get you. The appearances may have a lot to influence the initial attraction. Then why this innate speculation has nothing to do with the appearances?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by stevie »

Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:06 pm
stevie wrote: August 7th, 2022, 12:46 am
Sushan wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:56 am The concept of 'love on the first sight' is another concept that is found in literature of romance genre. Occasionally, like this author, people claim of having this feeling or the moment.

Is it a real thing? Or is it a 'made-up' reason for getting attracted towards or falling in love with someone when it is impossible to deliver a rational reason? Or is it a variation of the Deja vu phenomenan?
First there is an appearance and then speculative thought sets in. It's always the same, regardless what phenomenon you refer to. Your questions only refer to this innate speculative drive the products of which don't add anything reliable to appearances.
I am sorry, but I do not get you. The appearances may have a lot to influence the initial attraction. Then why this innate speculation has nothing to do with the appearances?
The appearance appears independent of your speculative question "Is it a real thing? ".
mankind ... must act and reason and believe; though they are not able, by their most diligent enquiry, to satisfy themselves concerning the foundation of these operations, or to remove the objections, which may be raised against them [Hume]
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Re: Love on the First Sight

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Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:05 pm
LuckyR wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:33 pm Obviously such a commonly used phrase is going to have numerous origins depending on individual circumstances. Some may reimagine their relationship's origin story with a rosy overtone. Others may have a genuine feeling of familiarity out of step with the amount of time spent together.
I can agree with that touch of a 'rosy overtone' to the experience. But regarding the feeling of familiarity, can it be just a feeling, or can it be what is described as 'deja vu'?
Yes, I believe it can.
"As usual... it depends."
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

stevie wrote: August 18th, 2022, 1:03 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:06 pm
stevie wrote: August 7th, 2022, 12:46 am
Sushan wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:56 am The concept of 'love on the first sight' is another concept that is found in literature of romance genre. Occasionally, like this author, people claim of having this feeling or the moment.

Is it a real thing? Or is it a 'made-up' reason for getting attracted towards or falling in love with someone when it is impossible to deliver a rational reason? Or is it a variation of the Deja vu phenomenan?
First there is an appearance and then speculative thought sets in. It's always the same, regardless what phenomenon you refer to. Your questions only refer to this innate speculative drive the products of which don't add anything reliable to appearances.
I am sorry, but I do not get you. The appearances may have a lot to influence the initial attraction. Then why this innate speculation has nothing to do with the appearances?
The appearance appears independent of your speculative question "Is it a real thing? ".
The occurrence of appearance can be independent from everything else. But appearance or experiencing the appearance is not an objective thing but a subjective experience. So, ultimately it will depend on many things, and that first impression may have an impact on our speculations.
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

LuckyR wrote: August 18th, 2022, 3:37 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:05 pm
LuckyR wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:33 pm Obviously such a commonly used phrase is going to have numerous origins depending on individual circumstances. Some may reimagine their relationship's origin story with a rosy overtone. Others may have a genuine feeling of familiarity out of step with the amount of time spent together.
I can agree with that touch of a 'rosy overtone' to the experience. But regarding the feeling of familiarity, can it be just a feeling, or can it be what is described as 'deja vu'?
Yes, I believe it can.
Thank you. Deja vu phenomenon is not yet understood clearly, but one theory says that it is a connection to a past memory which we do not recognize as such but as a new event that somehow feel like has happened earlier. So, can this 'love on first sight' thing be repeated and reproduced?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
stevie
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by stevie »

Sushan wrote: August 19th, 2022, 12:26 pm
stevie wrote: August 18th, 2022, 1:03 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:06 pm
stevie wrote: August 7th, 2022, 12:46 am

First there is an appearance and then speculative thought sets in. It's always the same, regardless what phenomenon you refer to. Your questions only refer to this innate speculative drive the products of which don't add anything reliable to appearances.
I am sorry, but I do not get you. The appearances may have a lot to influence the initial attraction. Then why this innate speculation has nothing to do with the appearances?
The appearance appears independent of your speculative question "Is it a real thing? ".
The occurrence of appearance can be independent from everything else. But appearance or experiencing the appearance is not an objective thing but a subjective experience. So, ultimately it will depend on many things, and that first impression may have an impact on our speculations.
You are just adding further speculations.
mankind ... must act and reason and believe; though they are not able, by their most diligent enquiry, to satisfy themselves concerning the foundation of these operations, or to remove the objections, which may be raised against them [Hume]
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by LuckyR »

Sushan wrote: August 19th, 2022, 12:27 pm
LuckyR wrote: August 18th, 2022, 3:37 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:05 pm
LuckyR wrote: August 6th, 2022, 4:33 pm Obviously such a commonly used phrase is going to have numerous origins depending on individual circumstances. Some may reimagine their relationship's origin story with a rosy overtone. Others may have a genuine feeling of familiarity out of step with the amount of time spent together.
I can agree with that touch of a 'rosy overtone' to the experience. But regarding the feeling of familiarity, can it be just a feeling, or can it be what is described as 'deja vu'?
Yes, I believe it can.
Thank you. Deja vu phenomenon is not yet understood clearly, but one theory says that it is a connection to a past memory which we do not recognize as such but as a new event that somehow feel like has happened earlier. So, can this 'love on first sight' thing be repeated and reproduced?
I don't understand what you are asking.
"As usual... it depends."
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

stevie wrote: August 20th, 2022, 1:12 am
Sushan wrote: August 19th, 2022, 12:26 pm
stevie wrote: August 18th, 2022, 1:03 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:06 pm

I am sorry, but I do not get you. The appearances may have a lot to influence the initial attraction. Then why this innate speculation has nothing to do with the appearances?
The appearance appears independent of your speculative question "Is it a real thing? ".
The occurrence of appearance can be independent from everything else. But appearance or experiencing the appearance is not an objective thing but a subjective experience. So, ultimately it will depend on many things, and that first impression may have an impact on our speculations.
You are just adding further speculations.
I am sorry, but I do not get you. What are the speculations that I have added anew to this discussion?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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Sushan
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Re: Love on the First Sight

Post by Sushan »

LuckyR wrote: August 20th, 2022, 2:47 am
Sushan wrote: August 19th, 2022, 12:27 pm
LuckyR wrote: August 18th, 2022, 3:37 am
Sushan wrote: August 17th, 2022, 10:05 pm

I can agree with that touch of a 'rosy overtone' to the experience. But regarding the feeling of familiarity, can it be just a feeling, or can it be what is described as 'deja vu'?
Yes, I believe it can.
Thank you. Deja vu phenomenon is not yet understood clearly, but one theory says that it is a connection to a past memory which we do not recognize as such but as a new event that somehow feel like has happened earlier. So, can this 'love on first sight' thing be repeated and reproduced?
I don't understand what you are asking.
In simple terms, what I wanted to ask was, can this 'love on the first sight' thing can happen more than once for the same person towards different counterparts, given that it has something to do with deja vu phenomenon?
“There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers”

– William James
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