The March 2023 Philosophy Book of the Month is Rediscovering the Wisdom of Human Nature: How Civilization Destroys Happiness by Chet Shupe.

Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Discuss the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes.

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Hellen Muriithi
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Hellen Muriithi »

I think the sentence retains its meaning, as most people believe that true love is sacrificing your happiness for another. Perhaps this comes from the romantic movies or books where the main characters are always fighting over their love interest and are willing to give up everything for each other. Although this might be possible in a fantasy world where there are no conflicts, in reality, it’s hard to base an entire relationship on two people sacrificing their needs and desires for someone else.
beckybelvin
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by beckybelvin »

As a twice divorced person, I still can say that I believe this to be true. I'm not sure I have ever felt this way about a man, but I definitely feel this way towards my parents, my children, and my grandchildren. Maybe that is why I'm not married.
OTrain M
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by OTrain M »

By sacrifice we need to be pretty specific on what we mean. When we hear the word, people have drastic and extreme ideas, like metaphorically setting yourself on fire to keep those you love warm, but, it can also mean stepping back a little bit and have people you love pass first. So by that, I agree with the statement that when you are happy to sacrifice, then it doesn't get true love than that.
Salah bourouba
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Salah bourouba »

Mounce574 wrote: November 1st, 2022, 3:41 pm If you sacrifice your happiness, I believe that grows resentment. If you resent someone, then you can't foster the feeling of love.
Exactly. And I would say that you need to love someone to understand that quote. It doesn't have to be a romantic love. It can be your mom or your friend. But if you don't know what love means or you haven't experienced it before. It's hard to understand the true meaning of this quote. Btw. The strongest love there is, is the love of a mother for her children. And look how happy they are sacrificing their love for the success of their children.
Meghan Sica
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Meghan Sica »

Yes! I agree wholeheartedly! Only when you are truly in love will you sacrifice it all!
AkshiP
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by AkshiP »

I agree with this statement. When you truly love someone, you would be happy sacrificing your happiness for them sometimes.
Amy Luman
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Amy Luman »

If it really makes you happy, is it a sacrifice? And if you're really in love, doesn't seeing the other person happy make you happy? If so, it's not a sacrifice, is it?
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Mounce574
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Mounce574 »

After rereading the book and reflecting more on this question I think I have come to this conclusion: You will never sacrifice yourself if you do not have inner peace. If you have inner peace you are not resigning yourself to the thought of not being happy because we want those around us to be happy- therefore it is reciprocal and nobody truly sacrifices but changes into a more positive and happy state of mind.
"Facts don't care about your feelings." Ben Shapiro
José Cortez
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by José Cortez »

I think sacrifice in relationships has led people to disasters. If we aren't happy to do certain things, then it isn't worth it with such a a person. I do not believe it is true love. A parent is happy to sacrifice for his or her child because it is true love. He or she does that without thinking in the slightest and is happy to do it. Happiness comes from sacfricing something for the betterment of the ones we truly love.
Blessing Chi Peculiar
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Blessing Chi Peculiar »

That sentence, in my opinion, still makes sense on its own. Any partnership involves a lot of giving and taking. No one is perfect, so when two imperfect people decide to get together, it is inevitable that both will eventually have to make a sacrifice in order to keep their relationship going. However, if they are truly in love, the sacrifice will be worth it.
Cheryl Erickson
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Cheryl Erickson »

I believe this quote stands alone for me. I understand it wholeheartedly. I have been married for 30 years. I love my husband deeply and I have made sacrifices for him. I would be happy to continue to make sacrifices for him. That comes with being in a loving and caring relationship. We are happy because we are with someone that loves us so much that we are willing to make sacrifices when needed.
Kelsey Roy
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Kelsey Roy »

I wholeheartedly agree with this sentiment. Unwilling or hesitant sacrifice breeds resentment, maybe not immediately but certainly as time passes. Wanting to change your goals/plans/actions for pure love causes happiness. One’s happiness should never be sacrificed for “love,” which I put in quotations because that’s not a true sentiment when the participant is unwilling.
ReviewsByChristine
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by ReviewsByChristine »

I think this statement stands alone. In fact, it very concisely captures my entire existence as a parent of toddlers. I have sacrificed many things that make me as an individual happy (traveling, adventure sports, free time, money, the ability to use the bathroom alone ha ha ha). But I am very happy to do so as the parent journey brings a different type of longer term love and joy.
Hazel Mae Bagarinao
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Hazel Mae Bagarinao »

True love means not complaining when you do sacrifices. It means doing service without expecting in return.
Christell Lindeque
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Re: Page 174: "True love is not sacrificing your happiness for another; true love is being happy to sacrifice."

Post by Christell Lindeque »

I am not sure how I feel about this quote. The first part of the quote is what I agree with. I do, however, have mixed feelings about the second part. This will only work if the other person in the relationship returns the sentiment.
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