Let go of the illusion that it could have been any different.

Post by **Lydia Matson** » January 31st, 2023, 4:26 pm

Scott wrote: ↑December 15th, 2022, 3:12 pm This is a discussion forum topic for the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but...

Let go of the illusion that it could have been any different.

We could rewind and replay the past a million times. It would happen the exact same way every single time.

Accept the past, and find peace by letting go of this illusion.

This is a very encouraging statement. I think it is debatable whether or not things could have had a different outcome due to different factors, but dwelling on that is not productive and hinders us from personal growth.

Post by **AkshiP** » January 31st, 2023, 5:33 pm

I agree with this statement. Too often people spend their time and energy fixating on what could've been instead of focusing on what can be.

Post by **Shillah Andeso** » February 1st, 2023, 10:06 am

This is the best thing I've read today. I now reflect on my actions and realize that even if I get another chance, I might make mistakes that I'll regret. It is good to understand that things had to happen in a certain way for a reason and live in the present.

Post by **ilze herholdt** » February 1st, 2023, 10:23 am

Even if you can somehow go back into the past it will anyway have the exact same outcome because you will still be stuck with the same knowledge you were back then. Therefore , not changing your actions and doing the exact same thing. People will always linger on the what if's because they always seek something better than what they currently have.

Post by **trevorlando** » February 1st, 2023, 2:39 pm

I thoroughly enjoyed these sort of aspects that were involved with the book. This book makes it easy for individuals to make the jump towards self re-discovery and pushes you towards a more personal and vulnerable spot. Although everyone knows that you can not change the past, considering we have no kind of real time machine yet, most people try and push these factors away. Quotes in the book made it easier to interact with and ponder concepts like these. The words here, make hard-to-reach concepts a little easier to fathom.

Post by **Joannasbookshelf** » February 2nd, 2023, 6:02 pm

This is such a challenging concept to wrap my head around. I always think that had I done X different, then Y would be different as well. Definitely something to remember!

February 3rd, 2023, 2:12 am

The quoted text made me think about how people dwell on things. You look back in time from where you sit now, only now you are a different person than you were then. If you knew now what you knew then, of course, you would've made different decisions. You shouldn't judge your past self for their mistakes by who you are now; after all, you were a different person when you made those mistakes.

February 3rd, 2023, 4:31 am

If we live under the guise that we cannot change the past, we limit our abilities. We are accepting defeat, and we are not ready to learn or even strive. From childhood, we have always struggled and would need to keep working to make ends meet. Things could have been different if you handled the case differently, if you behaved differently, if you prayed more, and given your best. We are not victims of fate but still have willpower. This discussion would definitely lead to Augustine's argument on "fate" and "free will." The ideas are sacrosanct to the author and presenter, and I totally respect them. More so, viewing it from the perspective of not allowing the past to hold you down it is excellent teaching, but flipping the coin, can trigger weakness, defeat, and possible laziness.

Post by **Hellen Muriithi** » February 3rd, 2023, 5:07 am

I live by the moment, that is, I take one day at a time. In essence, I accept the fact that I can do nothing about what happened in the past and can only do something about my reactions to what happened. That is, choosing to dwell in regrets about events that happened in the past would only affect my ability to live in the present.

Post by **abstactlemon** » February 13th, 2023, 9:03 am

I agree. It could be the same a million times, it could be a million different variations. But dwelling on that won’t change the fact that it happened the way it did. It’s good to learn from the past, but don’t let it dictate the present.

February 16th, 2023, 7:05 pm

I have come to the conclusion the things in my past are what made me who I am today. I can't change anything in the past, and I can't predict the future, but I can do something about it right now. What I do right now is exactly what I choose to do.

Post by **Tara D Morgan** » February 21st, 2023, 6:38 pm

Live for today as yesterday has already happened and tomorrow will only ever be a figment of your imagination!

Post by **ReviewsByChristine** » March 2nd, 2023, 11:42 am

This was one of the most important lessons in life I learned from my father, in the months after his own father passed away. He spent months grieving and building an addition to our house to keep busy. His final conclusion after months of reflection what that there is no winner in the what ifs game. You can play it in your head forever, but it won't change anything. In playing the what if game you are taking mental energy away from more positive pursuits.

Scott wrote: ↑December 15th, 2022, 3:12 pm This is a discussion forum topic for the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but...

Let go of the illusion that it could have been any different.

We could rewind and replay the past a million times. It would happen the exact same way every single time.

Accept the past, and find peace by letting go of this illusion.

---

Post by **Chris Alex Powell** » March 5th, 2023, 11:43 am

I totally agree. Not letting go means clinging to the past. If we are unable to let go of incidents that occurred in the past, we cannot move forward. This does not in any way imply that we cannot fight to regain possession of what was wrongfully taken from us. However, this should only be done where there are steps taken that could help us reclaim our position. Merely sitting down and wondering how things could have been different can not help. We should instead work towards the future.

Post by **Jack King 2** » March 5th, 2023, 2:38 pm

Scott wrote: ↑December 15th, 2022, 3:12 pm This is a discussion forum topic for the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but...

Let go of the illusion that it could have been any different.

We could rewind and replay the past a million times. It would happen the exact same way every single time.

Accept the past, and find peace by letting go of this illusion.

---

I agree to a degree. Focusing on the past makes it different to move forward and focus on the present and the future. That said there is something to be learned from our past mistakes to stop them happening again.