Philosophy Discussion Forums | A Humans-Only Club for Open-Minded Discussion & Debate

[Betsy House Mills]

Oh Scott!

How I wish I had a do-over with my kids! I love your answer:
For the more specific example you gave with your kids instead of saying "Try it yourself first, and then I can help if you still want me to help after you have already tried to do it on your own." Why not say something like:

"Do it yourself first, and then if you still want me to help, I will."

or...

"Please see if you are able to do it yourself without out my help, then if you find you cannot do it without my help, I will gladly help you."

That advice would be right up there with the word, "Really???" that I used when my son came running into the house to tell me someone had hit him. He didn't want me to fix it. He just wanted me to acknowledge that he had been hit. If he continued, I could add, "I bet that really hurt" or somesuch and usually he answered, "Yeah!!" and went right back out to play. Your advice would have been so positive!

I am doing what you suggest and erasing those six words out of my brain and vocabulary. Sometimes, if they do creep in, I swat them with my virtual fly-swatter! Thank you!!

[Seetha E]

I agree. Knowing this after reading your book and actually putting it into practice made the difference. It does change our approach.
It has helped me with consistency. Small but consistent. Thank you for this program.