I like to often phrase my appreciation for the beauty of freedom, the wonderful diversity it engenders, and (most importantly) my respect for other people's freedom as a loving apathy:
e.g. "I lovingly don't care whether you drink coffee tomorrow or not. Do what you want."
The antithesis of that is to should all over people and thereby get dirty miserable should all over yourself too:
"You should drink coffee tomorrow!"
"You should not drink coffee tomorrow."
"You should not be doing that!"
"They should not have done that!"
"The unchangeable past should be different than it unchangeably is!!!"
Even if you only say those kinds of things in your head, not out loud, you're still going to feel all shouldy, by which I mean ****. In fact, it's only more obvious that all your shoulding is only making you shouldy (i.e. miserable) when you are only doing it in your head rather than outloud. At one can think they are doing more than cutting off their to spite their face and just making their own experience **** when they literally point their judgemental figure to do out loud judgementalism, "You shouldn't be the way you are, Outside World That I Don't Control!"
You can cut the **** by letting go of the shoulds.
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In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is 100% guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
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"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."
I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.