Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here.

Discuss the November 2022 Philosophy Book of the Month, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes.

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Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Jacy Covers wrote: March 22nd, 2024, 5:41 pm I would like to know how you started this company from the scratch. Are there any plans to start a physical branch?
Hi, Jacy Covers,

Thank you for your question.

Here is the basic timeline of how I created my now very successful company:

1. As a young teenager, I taught myself computer programming and how to make and design websites. This was free (i.e. it cost me $0). There are plenty of free resources online to learn and teach yourself almost anything from computer programming to calculus. So 'not knowing how' or 'not having the knowledge/skills' is--in this day and age--generally never an honest excuse to not do something, such as start a business or achieve a big goal or dream.

2. I created a very simple initial version of the website, OnlineBookClub, which at the time was basically just a simple little website for people to join free and chat about books. The initial functioning working website probably took one or two days to make. To accelerate from 0 to 60, you start by accelerating to 1, which is incredibly easy to do.

3. While working low-wage paying day jobs full-time to pay my bills, I also spent many hours per week for years continuing to work on the website, program new features and updates to it, and promote it. For no pay for years, I invested my time week after week into gradually building it step by step more and more.

4. Even as the website and company became more successful, I continued to work my day jobs (namely as a server/bartender) to pay my bills and worked for the company as the hard-working CEO and sole full-time programmer for free. For many years, I worked over 80 hours per week total (40 at a paying job to make my living plus another 40 at OnlineBookClub for no pay). That in effect saved the company the cost of hiring a high-quality top-level manager/CEO and full-time programmer. In other words, I was essentially investing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of time into the business per year. And time is money, especially in business. It was effectively literally the equivalent of actually investing hundreds of thousands of dollars in cash per year in the business, but since I didn't have cash like that I made that investment in time. But to a business the difference between time and money is as negligible and effectively non-existent as the difference between one quarter versus five nickles. One is so easily exchanged for the other that they are effectively the same thing.

5. Eventually, in 2004, I made the very risky choice to gave up my day jobs and work full-time (times two) at OnlineBookClub, meaning I worked 80 hours per week at OnlineBookClub, which I then did for many more years. This worked similar to #4 because even though at this point I was now paying myself enough to live on, I was still really mostly working for free. I was working 80 hours per week and only paid myself a salary of $20,000 USD. In other words, I was paying myself less than $5 per hour, which is very little to live on in Connecticut, USA (the cost of living here is very high). At that time, I lived in a small two-bedroom apartment with my two kids. They each had a bedroom, and I used the would-be living room as my office and bedroom (and living room). I could have worked less than 80 per week or paid myself more than $5 per hour, but either of those choices would in the mid-term likely have resulted in the company going out of business and in the long-term certainly would have prevented it from reaching anything remotely close the level of success it has today.


When you consistently work 80 hours per week at something, week after week, every single week, for years, the question then becomes reversed: How could I not be successful at it?


In short, the company has what it has today because I effectively invested millions of dollars into the business (in the form of time), which I did by working 80 hours per week, week after week, for over 10 years for little to no pay. That's 10 years of working 80 hours per week while choosing to live at or below the poverty line despite working so much. I could have chosen to make much more money during those 10 years, namely by putting that 80 hours per week towards a paying job instead of investing it by putting it towards working on my business for no pay. But then I would not have a successful business now. Instead, I would still be working for someone else, selling 40-80+ hours of my time each week to someone else.

I prefer it this way, but to each their own. I can totally understand why many people would prefer it the other way. I can totally understand what many people choose to work less and make more in the short to mid term, rather than working way more now and making way less now as an investment in a distant future.

It's not just with money and business that that happens. Many would rather enjoy some extra tasty treats today than have better physical fitness next month. Many people would rather enjoy that extra drink tonight than avoid the hangover tomorrow. And there's nothing wrong with that. Many people simply aren't that charitable to their others in space and time, meaning they would rather have more for themselves even if it means less total for their team overall. As my book explains, it's fundamentally no different to make that kind of choice in relation to yourself now versus your so-called future self, versus making that choice in relation to yourself now versus your sibling or neighbor across the street or your great great grandchildren who you will never meet. Would you rather you get $5 or your sibling get $20 (and you get nothing)? Would you rather you get $5 or your neighbor down the road get $20 (and you get nothing)? Would you rather you get $5 or a stranger across the world who you will never meet get $20 (and you get nothing)? Neither answer is right or wrong; it's just a matter of preference and personality.

I am able to do what I do what I do in business and investing because I would rather future Scott get $20 than I get $5, which makes me odd and weird. Most humans aren't so charitable and so willing to lovingly sacrifice comfort for the benefit of others (with the word 'others' including their future selves over time).

For more on these concepts, I recommend re-reading the following two chapters in my book, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All:

- "The Three Relationship Types Between Temporal Selves (i.e. Your Past and Future Selves)"

- "The Three Relationship Types Between Spatial Selves"



You also asked, "Are there any plans to start a physical branch?"

We have ideas for that already listed in My List of Business Opportunities for Mentees, but no set plans. Namely, I would and will not choose to proceed with that (or anything like it) unless I have someone to partner with on the project, and those people are rare to come by and so far nobody has stepped up to the plate for that. And that ties into everything else I already said in the post: There's very few people out there who are willing to invest that kind of time-consuming work when the payoff would be so far out and partly uncertain. Most people prefer immediate gratification that is less versus delayed gratification that is more. For example, most people would rather get $100 today than $200 next year. They would rather get a paying job selling their time to work for someone right now than partner (or go solo) on a long-term business venture like that which would require a lot of work and time upfront before the big payoff eventually comes.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott



Most people would rather get less now than more later. Most people would rather get $5 today than get $20 next month. Most people would rather get $100 today than $200 next year. There is nothing wrong with that; it's just a choice and matter of preference. Some prefer to invest their time/money so their future self can reap even more benefits; Others prefer to spend their time/money now for maximum gratification now. Either choice is totally fair and reasonable.
Most people would rather get less now than more later. Most people would rather get $5 today than get $20 next month. Most people would rather get $100 today than $200 next year. There is nothing wrong with that; it's just a choice and matter of preference. Some prefer to invest their time/money so their future self can reap even more benefits; Others prefer to spend their time/money now for maximum gratification now. Either choice is totally fair and reasonable.



---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
Emmanuel Asamoah 5
Premium Member
Posts: 17
Joined: March 13th, 2024, 1:22 pm
Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes

Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Emmanuel Asamoah 5 »

Hi Eckhart,
how do you handle the situation of finding yourself in the midst of people who are always expressing negative or lower energy. What do you advice. I've encountered lots of people who are always wishing doom for themselves. They are at loggerheads with positivity. It is overwhelming to cope with it whenever I find myself in the midst of such people. I am mostly affected by this energy. How do you handle such people?
Swimmingly💖
“There is beauty in our unity no matter how harsh that war is, and no matter the result or winner. There is beauty even in losing if we do it together."
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
Emmanuel Asamoah 5
Premium Member
Posts: 17
Joined: March 13th, 2024, 1:22 pm
Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes

Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Emmanuel Asamoah 5 »

Hi Scott,
So, how are you able to balance family life and professional career life without becoming overwhelmed? can you tell me how these things work without any hurdles? For instance, how are you able to keep up with your audience on twitter, instagram, facebook, linkedin and of course, the popular OnlineBookClub and OnlinePhilosophy discussion forum, responding to millions of questions and in detail.
Responding to this query will mean a lot to me Scott.
Swimmingly,💖
“There is beauty in our unity no matter how harsh that war is, and no matter the result or winner. There is beauty even in losing if we do it together."
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
Emmanuel Asamoah 5
Premium Member
Posts: 17
Joined: March 13th, 2024, 1:22 pm
Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes

Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Emmanuel Asamoah 5 »

Eckhart Aurelius Hughes wrote: March 23rd, 2024, 4:09 pm If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Jacy Covers wrote: March 22nd, 2024, 5:41 pm I would like to know how you started this company from the scratch. Are there any plans to start a physical branch?
Hi, Jacy Covers,

Thank you for your question.

Here is the basic timeline of how I created my now very successful company:

1. As a young teenager, I taught myself computer programming and how to make and design websites. This was free (i.e. it cost me $0). There are plenty of free resources online to learn and teach yourself almost anything from computer programming to calculus. So 'not knowing how' or 'not having the knowledge/skills' is--in this day and age--generally never an honest excuse to not do something, such as start a business or achieve a big goal or dream.

2. I created a very simple initial version of the website, OnlineBookClub, which at the time was basically just a simple little website for people to join free and chat about books. The initial functioning working website probably took one or two days to make. To accelerate from 0 to 60, you start by accelerating to 1, which is incredibly easy to do.

3. While working low-wage paying day jobs full-time to pay my bills, I also spent many hours per week for years continuing to work on the website, program new features and updates to it, and promote it. For no pay for years, I invested my time week after week into gradually building it step by step more and more.

4. Even as the website and company became more successful, I continued to work my day jobs (namely as a server/bartender) to pay my bills and worked for the company as the hard-working CEO and sole full-time programmer for free. For many years, I worked over 80 hours per week total (40 at a paying job to make my living plus another 40 at OnlineBookClub for no pay). That in effect saved the company the cost of hiring a high-quality top-level manager/CEO and full-time programmer. In other words, I was essentially investing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of time into the business per year. And time is money, especially in business. It was effectively literally the equivalent of actually investing hundreds of thousands of dollars in cash per year in the business, but since I didn't have cash like that I made that investment in time. But to a business the difference between time and money is as negligible and effectively non-existent as the difference between one quarter versus five nickles. One is so easily exchanged for the other that they are effectively the same thing.

5. Eventually, in 2004, I made the very risky choice to gave up my day jobs and work full-time (times two) at OnlineBookClub, meaning I worked 80 hours per week at OnlineBookClub, which I then did for many more years. This worked similar to #4 because even though at this point I was now paying myself enough to live on, I was still really mostly working for free. I was working 80 hours per week and only paid myself a salary of $20,000 USD. In other words, I was paying myself less than $5 per hour, which is very little to live on in Connecticut, USA (the cost of living here is very high). At that time, I lived in a small two-bedroom apartment with my two kids. They each had a bedroom, and I used the would-be living room as my office and bedroom (and living room). I could have worked less than 80 per week or paid myself more than $5 per hour, but either of those choices would in the mid-term likely have resulted in the company going out of business and in the long-term certainly would have prevented it from reaching anything remotely close the level of success it has today.


When you consistently work 80 hours per week at something, week after week, every single week, for years, the question then becomes reversed: How could I not be successful at it?


In short, the company has what it has today because I effectively invested millions of dollars into the business (in the form of time), which I did by working 80 hours per week, week after week, for over 10 years for little to no pay. That's 10 years of working 80 hours per week while choosing to live at or below the poverty line despite working so much. I could have chosen to make much more money during those 10 years, namely by putting that 80 hours per week towards a paying job instead of investing it by putting it towards working on my business for no pay. But then I would not have a successful business now. Instead, I would still be working for someone else, selling 40-80+ hours of my time each week to someone else.

I prefer it this way, but to each their own. I can totally understand why many people would prefer it the other way. I can totally understand what many people choose to work less and make more in the short to mid term, rather than working way more now and making way less now as an investment in a distant future.

It's not just with money and business that that happens. Many would rather enjoy some extra tasty treats today than have better physical fitness next month. Many people would rather enjoy that extra drink tonight than avoid the hangover tomorrow. And there's nothing wrong with that. Many people simply aren't that charitable to their others in space and time, meaning they would rather have more for themselves even if it means less total for their team overall. As my book explains, it's fundamentally no different to make that kind of choice in relation to yourself now versus your so-called future self, versus making that choice in relation to yourself now versus your sibling or neighbor across the street or your great great grandchildren who you will never meet. Would you rather you get $5 or your sibling get $20 (and you get nothing)? Would you rather you get $5 or your neighbor down the road get $20 (and you get nothing)? Would you rather you get $5 or a stranger across the world who you will never meet get $20 (and you get nothing)? Neither answer is right or wrong; it's just a matter of preference and personality.

I am able to do what I do what I do in business and investing because I would rather future Scott get $20 than I get $5, which makes me odd and weird. Most humans aren't so charitable and so willing to lovingly sacrifice comfort for the benefit of others (with the word 'others' including their future selves over time).

For more on these concepts, I recommend re-reading the following two chapters in my book, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All:

- "The Three Relationship Types Between Temporal Selves (i.e. Your Past and Future Selves)"

- "The Three Relationship Types Between Spatial Selves"



You also asked, "Are there any plans to start a physical branch?"

We have ideas for that already listed in My List of Business Opportunities for Mentees, but no set plans. Namely, I would and will not choose to proceed with that (or anything like it) unless I have someone to partner with on the project, and those people are rare to come by and so far nobody has stepped up to the plate for that. And that ties into everything else I already said in the post: There's very few people out there who are willing to invest that kind of time-consuming work when the payoff would be so far out and partly uncertain. Most people prefer immediate gratification that is less versus delayed gratification that is more. For example, most people would rather get $100 today than $200 next year. They would rather get a paying job selling their time to work for someone right now than partner (or go solo) on a long-term business venture like that which would require a lot of work and time upfront before the big payoff eventually comes.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott




less-now-or-more-later.png




---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
Scott,
your entrepreneurial journey with OnlineBookClub is truly inspiring. The dedication, hard work and sacrifices you made over so many years to build the company from nothing into a thriving success is extraordinary. Investing your valuable time for little to no pay in the early years, driven by belief in your vision, demonstrates remarkable commitment. You are a role model for aspiring business founders. The wise insights you shared about delayed gratification, investing in your future self, and the power of consistent effort are profound. Congratulations on beating the odds. Ever since joining OnlineBookClub, the observations I've made is that, every instruction comes with clarity. Anytime I find myself on the site, it feels like you're talking to me directly even though I haven't seen or heard your voice before. This was truely an investment. Congratulations once again.
Swimmingly,💖
“There is beauty in our unity no matter how harsh that war is, and no matter the result or winner. There is beauty even in losing if we do it together."
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
Emmanuel Asamoah 5
Premium Member
Posts: 17
Joined: March 13th, 2024, 1:22 pm
Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes

Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Emmanuel Asamoah 5 »

Hi Eckhart,💖
I'm still on "In it together" and I'm at suggestion number 4 and I do nbnot understand this part so I'm quoting the part I do not seem to comprehend:
Suggestion Four — Let go of moralizing or similarly judgmental language.
The moralizer conjures up shoulds and oughts, and then, instead of contently saying about reality, it is what it is, says resentfully, it ought not be what it is. The moralizer says, "The unchangeable truth should be different." The moralizer says, "It is what it inexorably is but it ought not be what it inexorably is."
In reality, there are no shoulds and oughts. There simply is what is and what's not. Whatever it is, it is what it is.
To conjure shoulds and oughts is yet another way to needlessly fight unchangeable reality, to needlessly fight the truth, to resent with discontent rather than accept with loving inner peace. In that way, it is just another way to bitterly try or lie, instead of contently accept. Simply accept what inexorably is. Anything that already is inexorably is. That includes not just the past, but anything that already appears in the present, as well as anything already fated in the future. It is engraved in the unchanging stone of eternal timeless holistic reality.

Swimmingly,💖
“There is beauty in our unity no matter how harsh that war is, and no matter the result or winner. There is beauty even in losing if we do it together."
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
Leonie Vermaak
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Leonie Vermaak »

It's proof yet again that hard work pays off in the end. I would gladly work as hard as you with as little income as you in the beginning to make a success in the long run.

You truly are an inspiration to me.

Thanks for that.
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Risper Ouma Lisa Anyango »

You worked really hard to get to where you are and you deserve to enjoy your success now. Work8ng 80 hours a week is something that can't be accomplished by someone who is lazy and not motivated. Moreso, after some years, a person gives up and starts looking for a way better job. So I would say, that your one of the few who us willing to hard damn hard until they get what they want no matter how long it takes. That makes you more than a hero. Kudos
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Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

Emmanuel Asamoah 5 wrote: March 23rd, 2024, 8:29 pm Hi Scott,
So, how are you able to balance family life and professional career life without becoming overwhelmed?
Hi, Emmanuel Asamoah 5,

That question was already asked by a different person much earlier and answered by me:

How are you able to balance your work and do it so efficiently? How do balance your time so well to accomplish all you do?


I do strongly encourage you to read through all of the previous Mentoring Q&As, as many of the other questions and answers will apply to you too and help you greatly.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
User avatar
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
The admin formerly known as Scott
Posts: 5780
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Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

Emmanuel Asamoah 5 wrote: March 23rd, 2024, 8:29 pm can you tell me how these things work without any hurdles?
Hi, Emmanuel Asamoah 5,

Thank you for question.

I don't think they do work without hurdles, per se, depending on what you mean by hurdles exactly.

For more on that, I recommend you read the following advice article of mine:

Life is challenge. Every single day life punches you in the face, repeatedly. That's what is so great about it!

Additionally, I recommend you read (or re-read) the following two specific Q&As from the Mentoring Q&A:

- What was your greatest challenge, and how were you able to overcome it?

- Can you share a time when you faced a significant obstacle on your path to achieving a goal? How did you overcome it?


However, I also very very strongly recommend you read all of the mentoring Q&A, which you can find listed in full here. Not only will they contain massive amounts of advice that will apply to you too.

Please do make sure to read through all of the previous questions before posting more questions to avoid this issue of re-asking questions that have already been asked before.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott



For instance, how are you able to keep up with your audience on twitter, instagram, facebook, linkedin and of course, the popular OnlineBookClub and OnlinePhilosophy discussion forum, responding to millions of questions and in detail.
Responding to this query will mean a lot to me Scott.
Swimmingly,💖
[/quote]
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
User avatar
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
The admin formerly known as Scott
Posts: 5780
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Favorite Philosopher: Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Emmanuel Asamoah 5 wrote: March 23rd, 2024, 8:29 pm how are you able to keep up with your audience on twitter, instagram, facebook, linkedin and of course, the popular OnlineBookClub and OnlinePhilosophy discussion forum, responding to millions of questions and in detail.
Hi, Emmanuel Asamoah 5,

Thank you for your question.

This one is an easy one. The answer is that I delegate.

I have a team of hourly staff working 24/7 who respond to any messages sent in using the official contact form at OnlineBookClub. Indeed, we get thousands of messages per day. No one human (not even me) could read and answer them all, even if that is all the one human ever did besides sleep. In other words, that task alone takes more than 16 hours per day, and it's just one of the few tasks that needs to be done everyday to keep OnlineBookClub running.

Social media is even easier to deal with. On most platforms, I set up an auto-responder in my DMs/inbox to instruct the person to send in their message using the official contact form at OnlineBookClub. So I don't even look at my social media inbox on my social media websites.

As for the public comments and such, I don't even read let alone reply to all the public comments on my posts on social media. If someone has a message they really want me to see, or a question they want me to answer, it would be very foolish and ineffective for them to rely on posting that as a public comment on some random social media post of mine, and that would be their problem if that's the strategy they used to get their question/message to me. Keeping up with social media comments is not a priority for me.

That point ties heavily into my previous advice to you about setting and strictly enforcing firm healthy boundaries. If I desperately tried to answer every question I get from random strangers on social media, or otherwise tried to juggle way too much by being a people-pleaser or yes-person who does whatever anyone asks me, I'd end up dropping everything and effectively juggling less than nothing.

I make sure people know the recommended ways to get in touch with me or get help with OnlineBookClub, which is to use the official contact form at OnlineBookClub). And I make sure people know the only way to ask me a question in a way that they can be sure I both (1) read their question and (2) personally answer it myself is to post the question either in the Mentoring Q&A or in the AMA, both of which require someone prove they at least bought my book (and hopefully read it already) which helps drastically minimize the number of questions I get since most questions someone would have are already answered by my book itself. I believe this free Q&A that I am doing right now even by writing this post is an investment that will save me lots of time in the future. I believe it will ultimately save me much more time than it costs me to do, so that's why I am doing it.

That's one of the main reasons I wrote my book, In It Together, and invested all the time into it that I did. I spent over 5 years working on my book, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All. I spent thousands of hours working on it.

However, investing thousand of hours of time and work into that book over 5 years was and is ultimately a huge time-saver for me because now anytime I get a question that is answered in the book, I can simply say, "just read the book", and I don't even get those questions nearly as often anymore since typically anyone who has read my book won't even bother asking them since they've already been answered via the book. One of the helpful techniques I used to write the book was simply to think of, remember, and/or brainstorm about all the questions I've gotten from people over the years, especially as they relate to the noticeable aspects of external success in business and fitness and in other respects and hobbies of mine as well as my self-discipline in general and what many would falsely label as my seemingly huge exceptional willpower. Of course, as those who read my book and follow my Mentoring Q&A already understand, I don't have more willpower than the average person just as I don't have more hours in the day. I get the same 24 hours per day we all get, and I am so stingy with my willpower and time that I likely spend less of it than most people. I don't succeed so much more at some tasks than most other people because I have more willpower than they do (I don't have more willpower), but rather it's because of how I spend the very limited willpower that I do have, along with other factors such as my invincible inner peace and spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) and how I choose to spend my very limited time, money, and energy. No amount of willpower can make up for sloppy spending, but lack of willpower makes a great scapegoat for one who spends their time, money, and/or energy in sloppy or selfish ways, especially in the sense of what my book calls 'temporal selfishness' (i.e. valuing immediate gratification far more than delayed gratification even when the delayed gratification would be far greater).

In sum, this is how I am so effective at not only getting so much done myself but having the business I own get so much done and keep up with the thousands of questions and requests that come in every single day:

1. I delegate. If there is any chore or work task that I spend time doing every day or every week that I can train and/or pay someone else to do, then I delegate it. In other words, if I can train and/or pay someone else to do it, I do train and pay someone else to do it. This is also the basic key to scaling a business: I keep hiring new people and training them to do what I am currently doing, which frees my up time for me to take on new tasks and projects so that as a whole the company is doing even more: it's doing everything it what was doing before including what I was doing before but now also doing this new stuff that I am now doing with my new free time. Then I just repeat that process over and over and over. Then if you can effectively train other people in your company to delegate, the growth becomes exponential. You keep doubling the amount of staff you have and doubling the amount of work/productivity done.

2. I set and strictly and stubbornly enforce firm healthy boundaries. Part of that can be described as me being very stingy with my time, money, and willpower. I don't let other people waste my time; and truly nobody can waste your time, per se, because generally you have to allow them to do it. It would only ever be you wasting your time, and other people and their requests and such would just be the means by which you waste your own time. In other words, I am diligent about not being a 'people-pleaser' or 'yes-person' or otherwise engaging in toxic passiveness, but instead being someone who firmly practices self-responsibility and assertiveness (which is very different from aggression, which is itself just another form of unassertiveness and a sign of extreme lack of self-responsibility.) I don't get into a lot of fights, which would take a lot of time and energy and resources, because, for example, if you are the kind of person I would fight with, you won't be in my house in the first place for me to fight with you. Since I have all the energy and resources saved up that others waste on needless fights, in the rare cases where I do have to fight someone (e.g. someone tries to break in my house or refuses to leave when I tell them to leave) they will lose the fight. The fight would be so quick and easy for me that to even call it a fight would be a bit of a misnomer. True assertiveness makes you so powerful and graceful that your borders tend to be enforced and defended without you even needing to fight because it's so obvious to would-be intruders and would-be invaders and would-be infringers that you would easily win the fight. The aggressors will choose easier victims. And, even if you do have to fight in a sense of the word, it's so easy for you to win that it's practically not even a fight. A great example from social media: I block people if they do things I ask them not to do on my social media page. It's generally pretty easy to similarly 'block' people in real life (i.e. cut them out of your life). I had a family member once who asked me to help them publish a book. I had said yes out of loving kindness to do them a kind favor, but then they started messaging me on my personal cell phone number about it, and I told them not to do that because I don't use my personal cellphone for work. They continued to message me there so I quickly and simply told them I'm not going to help them publish their book; deal is over. They wanted to negotiate and argue about it, but there was no negotiation to have. I clearly had expressed my boundary and they violated it and so I canceled the deal and had no interest in negotiating or re-considering. I didn't even reply to those messages they sent me to appeal my decision, and I put their chat on mute so that I wouldn't even get the notifications. In a similar situation, I might even just block the number. Stuff like that is rare in my life because my family, friends, and associates know I'm like that. For example, friends and family won't bother begging me to wake up early to catch an early flight because they know I simply won't. If they ask me for a favor, or invite me to go some place, and I say no, they don't bother trying to pressure or shame me into doing it, or even trying engage my in some kind of verbal fight or battle of wits or will. People don't bother to put shaming social pressure or such on you when they know it won't work. People who know me at all know that my no means no, and that my valuable yes actually means yes. It's not just literal physical fights that I don't need to spend time on because they don't happen; it's also all the non-physical fights that one might have when dealing with boundary-crossers and dealing with people who engage in manipulation, begging, shaming, and/or social pressuring, or people that don't take you at your simple word be that word no or be that word yes . I don't even have to have those fights because people know they will be wasting their effort to fight me in that way. My spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) is too great and invincible and infinitely easy for me, and anyone who reads my book and strictly follows all 11 numbered suggestions at the end will find themselves in the same wonderful peaceful proverbial boat. It comes with such an incredible degree of power, safety, confidence, and grace that it's almost indescribable. People won't even think of you as 'assertive' (even though that's what it is); they will think of you as very 'powerful' and 'graceful'--and perhaps stubborn and extremely self-determined. The will see all the wonderful symptoms of it, but to get those noticeable symptoms you must first choose to have the self-discipline (a.k.a. spiritual freedom), brutal honesty, and boundary-enforcing assertiveness of which those symptoms are symptomatic.

3. I profitably use my loving tolerance for delayed gratification to invest my time, money, and energy into things that will save me even more time, money and energy in the future. For example, I would gladly spend 2 hours today programming an app that saves me 10 minutes every day for the rest of my life, which is something I've done many times in my life. It's one of the reasons I love programming so much. Likewise, I am happy to spend $100 today to buy something that I could easily sell for $1,000 next year. This technique is explained in more detail in my answer to the question, How did you start your company from scratch and make it so successful..


Let me sum that all up into a simple three-word mantra you can use to remember it: Delegate; boundaries; invest.

Say it with me now: Delegate; boundaries; invest. :)


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott



Refuse to do (a.k.a. 'eliminate') tasks that are neither important nor urgent. That will save you a ton of time and energy.<br /><br />Delegate whatever else you can.<br /><br />Finally, with what little is left, create a schedule, plan, routine, and/or to-do list to come up with a peaceful happy system to do the rest of the tasks based on priority/urgency, focusing on monotasking. In other words, don't plan on juggling many things at once. Plan to do things one at a time in order of urgency and/or importance, and then simply stick to the plan.
Refuse to do (a.k.a. 'eliminate') tasks that are neither important nor urgent. That will save you a ton of time and energy.

Delegate whatever else you can.

Finally, with what little is left, create a schedule, plan, routine, and/or to-do list to come up with a peaceful happy system to do the rest of the tasks based on priority/urgency, focusing on monotasking. In other words, don't plan on juggling many things at once. Plan to do things one at a time in order of urgency and/or importance, and then simply stick to the plan.




---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

If you haven't already, you can sign up to be personally mentored by Scott "Eckhart Aurelius" Hughes at this link.

Emmanuel Asamoah 5 wrote: March 23rd, 2024, 9:04 pm Hi Eckhart,💖
I'm still on "In it together" and I'm at suggestion number 4 and I do not understand this part so I'm quoting the part I do not seem to comprehend:
Suggestion Four — Let go of moralizing or similarly judgmental language.
The moralizer conjures up shoulds and oughts, and then, instead of contently saying about reality, it is what it is, says resentfully, it ought not be what it is. The moralizer says, "The unchangeable truth should be different." The moralizer says, "It is what it inexorably is but it ought not be what it inexorably is."
In reality, there are no shoulds and oughts. There simply is what is and what's not. Whatever it is, it is what it is.
To conjure shoulds and oughts is yet another way to needlessly fight unchangeable reality, to needlessly fight the truth, to resent with discontent rather than accept with loving inner peace. In that way, it is just another way to bitterly try or lie, instead of contently accept. Simply accept what inexorably is. Anything that already is inexorably is. That includes not just the past, but anything that already appears in the present, as well as anything already fated in the future. It is engraved in the unchanging stone of eternal timeless holistic reality.
Hi, Emmanuel Asamoah 5,

Thank you for your question.

For more about that subject, I suggest you read the following post, including all the linked topics:

Topics about the dangerous superstition of 'shoulds' and 'oughts' and other resentful, moralizing judgementalism


However, as a short bottom-line takeaway for what "Suggestion 4" in the book is specifically advising you to do, here is what the bottom line instruction is: Don't say or write the words 'should' or 'ought', at least not without quotation marks, and do your honest best to not even think the words 'should' or 'ought'.

(Technically, the exception is that you can use the words to deny that shouldness and oughtness exist, namely such as when we say things like "there are no 'shoulds'" or that "nothing unchangeable 'should' be different than it unchangeably is", but when in doubt keep it simple and just don't use them at all, or at least put quotation marks around them to help clarify that you are talking about something that doesn't exist.)

Since you cannot fully control the verbal thoughts that pop into your inner monologue, insofar as your brain suddenly does think the word 'should' or the word 'ought' at any point (e.g. "X shouldn't have happened!" or "X ought to be different than it unchangeably is!"), simply choose to not believe those thoughts. In other words, refuse to willfully believe those thoughts. Do notice them, do acceptingly allow them to exist, but then simply don't believe them. If desired, you can say/think back to yourself/brain, with a happy smile, "No, Brain, that's not true. There are no shoulds, and there no oughts. Shoulds and oughts are just imaginary phantoms that would cause me real misery to believe in."

Insofar as you can control whether or not you get mad at your brain, don't be mad at your brain for thinking those false thoughts. That's what brains do. Human brains think lots of false thoughts. They are funny like that. You can play with them too because of it, and look up fun optical illusions online. And then you can smile and laugh at your human brain as it does what brains constantly do as you look at the optical illusions. "Silly brain," you can say to it with a loving smile as you enjoy those wonderful fun optical illusions.

Watching your own brain can be like watching a beloved silly pet dog desperately chase its own tail. :lol:

It's one of my favorite things to do. That's why I don't have or need a pet dog. I have my own pet brain to watch. And it's so wonderfully silly sometimes. And by sometimes, I mean lots of the time. Basically all the time. It's a wonderfully hilarious and lovable pet to have.


With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott


Everything is acceptable and lovable. What you control is the way you are choosing for it to be, and everything else is to be fully and unconditionally accepted as that which you do not control.
Everything is acceptable and lovable. What you control is the way you are choosing for it to be, and everything else is to be fully and unconditionally accepted as that which you do not control.


***

The two boxes are actually the same exact color and shade. Silly human brain :)
The two boxes are actually the same exact color and shade. Silly human brain :)


***

The two lines are actually the same length. Silly human brain :)
The two lines are actually the same length. Silly human brain :)



---
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
Risper Ouma Lisa Anyango
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Risper Ouma Lisa Anyango »

The whole thought of you having your brain as the pet is hilarious
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Eckhart Aurelius Hughes »

I believe I have answered all the questions that were posted in this topic so far. However, if I missed any, please do let me know by re-posting them. And, of course, if any of you have any other questions or any follow-up questions or requests for clarification in regard to my previous answers, please do post those here as well. :)
My entire political philosophy summed up in one tweet.

"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."

I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
Pimporn Chandee1
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Joined: November 3rd, 2023, 9:46 am

Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Pimporn Chandee1 »

I really and truly admire your perseverance, and entrepreneurial spirit at such a young age. If I could turn time back, I wish I have had an opportunity to learn how to live life successfully for myself and my family the way you have done so. I was too afraid of my family of 8 having nothing to eat, my younger brothers and sisters losing their opportunity to study if I had left my first full-time job for something better in the long run. I was also blinded by the fact that my first job seemed more like a hobby than work. I loved everything I did for the first 5 years. So now I suffer the consequences of spending all my time and energy working for someone else and not for me!
Pimporn Chandee1
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Re: Public Q&A for My Mentees (or Anyone Who Wants My Advice) -- If you want my advice about anything, post your Qs here

Post by Pimporn Chandee1 »

The above was not a question but sharing my thoughts.
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