Slayton Natasha Tillett wrote: ↑August 31st, 2024, 8:38 am What advice can you give someone who has alot of visions or projects but doesn't have the resources to make it a reality?Hi, Slayton Natasha Tillett,
Thank you for your question!
My first piece of advice would be to re-read my book, In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All.
Especially the first suggestion at the end about always being totally and utterly honest, since without following that suggestion all the others become pointless. If you can be honest without being brutal, then go for it, but never ever choose non-brutality over honesty, especially when it comes to being honest with yourself.
From there, the next most relevant suggestion to your question is "Suggestion Ten". Here is an excerpt from that chapter:
In It Together (Page 186) wrote:
Needless to say, someone who trusts themself to keep their commitments and promises will be much more careful about making such promises. To use finances as both an analogy and a metaphor for the broader concept, someone who reliably pays their financial debts will be more careful about taking out high-interest loans. Accordingly, a useful motto or rule of thumb is as follows:
Make fewer commitments, but keep more of the commitments you make.
Choose your battles, stingily. Do less, better.
In one sense, everyone lacks the resources to make all their could-be projects and visions a reality. Take me for example: Each day, I come up with multiple genius business ideas, any one of which, if I made it into my #1 priority, would take off and become a billion-dollar company. But the most key phrase there is "any one of which" with the most key word being "one".
To that last point, the following social media posts of mine are especially relevant:
Any time, money, or energy I put towards the 99% of things I care least about, I take away from the 1% I care most about.
I am well accomplished through intentional laziness. I set as few goals as possible, then go full-force at those few goals with all I got.
I suggest you write down all the different visions, projects, and goals you have. Brainstorm and write down all of them. Think of what you do on a regular basis and put those on the list, since they are clearly priorities to you. For instance, if you drink a glass of wine most nights, you would put that down on the list as one of your goals/projects (e.g. "Goal #247: Drink at least one glass of wine per night."). That ties back to why I first mentioned how extremely important honesty is and how everything else in my book and in the post is utterly irrelevant and useless if you aren't always totally honest with yourself (and generally honest with everyone else). Obviously, if you are making time for something every single day or even once per week every week, then that thing is a very high priority for you and must be on your list of goals/priorities/visions/projects.
Then, once you have your very long list of goals, projects, visions, and priorities—all current, future, and potential goals/projects/visions/etc.—sort them by which one is your absolute #1 top priority or dream to the lesser ones.
From there, I would bet that you will see you have more than enough resources to achieve your true #1 priority, whatever it is.
For more on that, please see my advice article:
99% of the time someone says they cannot do something, they are lying to me and/or themselves.
When it comes to that long list of all goals/priorities/projects you have or are considering having, the following rule of thumb is typically true of everyone. It's definitely true of me and almost certainly true of you:
You can't have everything, but you can have anything.
Generally speaking, you never lack the resources to make your #1 priority/goal/dream/project a successful reality. But you can either (1) lie to yourself about what your priorities are, or (2) somehow invest your limited time/money/energy/etc. in something that isn't your alleged top priority when you could instead invest that time/money/energy/etc. into your alleged top priority.
Failure-believers (i.e. those who, unlike me, believe trying and failure are real things) will say that people tend to fail at achieving their top priorities and fail to succeed at their top projects/visions because they spread themselves too thin, fighting too many battles on too many fronts.
Of course, as you surely know, I don't believe in trying and failure, meaning I don't believe trying or failure are real things, but rather I believe they are imaginary phantoms of self-deception and self-delusion.
So I would describe it—what those thinly spread people do—like this: They succeed at spreading themselves thinly. They succeed at lying to themselves about what their top priorities and true goals really are. They choose to succeed at spreading themselves thinly on things that they say aren't their top priority instead of putting all those resources towards what they say is their top priority. They succeed at choosing to not achieve what they claim is their top priority.
Generally speaking, I never ever see someone (or myself) as failing to achieve their goal. Instead, I see them as succeeding at choosing to not achieve what they claim is their goal.
If I see someone say their goal is to lose weight while they lift their 100th cupcake that same day to their mouth and take a bite, I don't say or think, "They are failing to lose weight." No, I instead say or think, "They are succeeding at their goal of enjoying delicious cupcakes instead of losing weight." I'll think or say, "They have the choice between losing weight or eating lots of delicious cupcakes, and they prefer the cupcakes to the weight loss, and thus they are getting exactly what they want, meaning what they choose."
I say it with love and a loving smile and a loving giggle: Most humans are miserable liars.
And when I say most, that's an understatement. It's not 51%. I'd estimate over 99% of humans are miserable liars. They choose to not follow Suggestion One from my book, and thus they are miserable, meaning they lack the unwavering wonderful invincible true happiness (a.k.a. invincible inner peace and spiritual freedom) that anyone can have if they simply choose to follow the infinitely easy-to-follow suggestions in my book.
For instance, no matter how much someone claims they are "trying" to stay faithful to their spouse or claims that their goal/project/vision is to stay faithful to their spouse, I never look at someone cheating on their spouse by having an affair and think, "That person is failing to stay faithful to their spouse." No, I instead lovingly say or lovingly think the obvious simple undeniable truth: "That person is succeeding at cheating on their spouse." They aren't failing at their stated goal; they are succeeding at their true goal.
Of them, and everything, I lovingly think, "Good for them! They are getting exactly what they want, meaning what they choose."
For more on that subject, please do read the following advice articles of mine:
Failure is a miserable hellish self-deceiving illusion. There is no try. Everyone and everything is a success.
Beware: The phrase "work hard" can be just as dishonest and dangerous as the word "try". Be very careful with it!
Trying, failure, underachievement, and should-not-have-ness are imaginary phantoms that cause you real misery.
When I see someone in hell, I smile inside myself, and I think, "Good for him; he's getting what he's choosing."
You have the resources to make your vision a reality. You have the resources to achieve your true #1 priority. You will achieve your top goal/vision/project/priority. The question that your future will know the answer to is simply this: What is that top goal/vision/project/priority? What do you really want more than you want anything else? You'll get that, and so what you really want will be revealed by what you get, meaning what you do.
With love,
Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
a.k.a. Scott
In addition to having authored his book, In It Together, Eckhart Aurelius Hughes (a.k.a. Scott) runs a mentoring program, with a free option, that guarantees success. Success is guaranteed for anyone who follows the program.
"The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master."
I believe spiritual freedom (a.k.a. self-discipline) manifests as bravery, confidence, grace, honesty, love, and inner peace.
View Bookshelves page for In It Together: The Beautiful Struggle Uniting Us All